I remember this being asked of me, and most other kids around me when I was growing up. Back then “when you grow up” was fairly well defined, or so I thought. Only as I have been growing up have I realized, continue to realize, that I am not quite done growing up. Not even sure I ever will.
But even while I am not done growing up, I am no longer a child or a young adult. I can’t be either of these because I am parent to 2 individuals who are probably young adults.
Not sure we are all on the same page when we say, “can’t wait till things go back to normal”. Not saying I too have not have the same thought – I have. I am just not sure that my list of “normal” things that I am looking forward to may not quite be the same as your, or vice versa.
For me personally, working “remotely” was “normal” for a long time. So, no longer having to work remotely, would NOT be going back to normal.
There are times in life when you have to re-act, but if we can keep that to a minimum and try to be pro-active more it puts us in more of a position of control. Which does not mean necessarily a need to be “controlling” of things but more taking ownership and responsibility. When we don’t take ownership / responsibility it becomes easier for us to put the blame on someone / something else.
Recently I saw a couple of video posts of Will Smith. I was not really searching or anything but I believe they showed up on my FB and / or Twitter feeds.
The first of these posts had to do with his confession to his wife that he could not be responsible for her happiness, nor she for his.
I am not simply writing this post to re-share or talk about Will Smith’s beautiful posts but more as a reminder that I have written on these specific topics and hoping that I will revisit those and maybe edit enhance the.
As a parent I find myself struggling with the idea of raising my children. OK, “struggling” might be a bit to hard – I find myself asking “am I doing it right?” Of course, I don’t even know what right is. I do try to talk to other’s but often end up arguing with people who are so sure of their methods that I find it difficult to actually have a conversation. the best conversation I have are with people who are open to other thoughts / ideas / possibilities. This is not just limited to conversation about raising children but conversations about almost any topic.
Anyway, a friend of mine once mentioned a couple of things that really stuck with me and I wanted to be sure to capture them before I forget. His first comment was:
Raising your children has 3 stages.
Age 1-4 foundation
Age 5-12 discipline instilling
Age 12-18 consulting
He also mentioned that he had 3 goals in raising his children.
That they (his kids) have their own authentic friendship with God
That they treat others with respect and compassion