Not sure we are all on the same page when we say, “can’t wait till things go back to normal”. Not saying I too have not have the same thought – I have. I am just not sure that my list of “normal” things that I am looking forward to may not quite be the same as your, or vice versa.
For me personally, working “remotely” was “normal” for a long time. So, no longer having to work remotely, would NOT be going back to normal.
The first time I learned that someone I knew took her own life, I was in elementary school.
There are times in life when you have to re-act, but if we can keep that to a minimum and try to be pro-active more it puts us in more of a position of control. Which does not mean necessarily a need to be “controlling” of things but more taking ownership and responsibility. When we don’t take ownership / responsibility it becomes easier for us to put the blame on someone / something else.
Recently I saw a couple of video posts of Will Smith. I was not really searching or anything but I believe they showed up on my FB and / or Twitter feeds.
The first of these posts had to do with his confession to his wife that he could not be responsible for her happiness, nor she for his.
I am not simply writing this post to re-share or talk about Will Smith’s beautiful posts but more as a reminder that I have written on these specific topics and hoping that I will revisit those and maybe edit enhance the.
I am fairly certain we all at some point or another, maybe even many times, have had thought what it was that made / make us happy.
This afternoon, I stumbled on a TED Talk by Sam Berns entitled “My philosophy for a happy life“.
At the age of 2 Sam, as you will have learned if you watch the talk I have embedded above, was diagnosed with Progeria, a rare, rapid aging disease.
- Be OK with what you ultimately can’t do, because there is so much you CAN do.
- Surround yourself with people you want to be around.
- Keep moving forward
- Never miss a party if you can help it
As a parent I find myself struggling with the idea of raising my children. OK, “struggling” might be a bit to hard – I find myself asking “am I doing it right?” Of course, I don’t even know what right is. I do try to talk to other’s but often end up arguing with people who are so sure of their methods that I find it difficult to actually have a conversation. the best conversation I have are with people who are open to other thoughts / ideas / possibilities. This is not just limited to conversation about raising children but conversations about almost any topic.
Anyway, a friend of mine once mentioned a couple of things that really stuck with me and I wanted to be sure to capture them before I forget. His first comment was:
Raising your children has 3 stages.
- Age 1-4 foundation
- Age 5-12 discipline instilling
- Age 12-18 consulting
He also mentioned that he had 3 goals in raising his children.
- That they (his kids) have their own authentic friendship with God
- That they treat others with respect and compassion
- That they really enjoy their own existence.
It was a weird day. I heard of 2 of my friends ending their relationship.
Earlier in the morning a friend from work mentioned that the relationship she had with for the last 5 years had ended. And later in the evneing I ran into one of my daughters’ friend’s parent who is going thru a divorce ending a 20 year marriage.
My friend from work, who had been in her relationship for 5 years but not married or engaged, mentioned that she knew that they had grown more and more apart but she was still together because the co-dependency was comfortable. Whereas my daughter’s friend’s mother, who had been married for 20 years, said that her husband was cheating and they were working on it and he did it again. Ending the relatioship (they are still in the process of their divorce) was more a relief for her and her children and they were more able to move forward.